When all you want is football (NFL blog EN VIVO, Week 1)

Posted: September 12, 2010 in Uncategorized

Football is back! I hope you’re entertained as we whip around the league for Week One of the 91st NFL season. You can find previous live blogs here and here.

All times Eastern
3:55 pm: And we are at the ManZone ¡EN VIVO!!! If football is not really your thing, don’t worry! We’ll also have “live look-ins” for the FIBA Championships Gold Medal Game, the men’s U.S. Open final, (Djokovic-Nadal) and the True Blood season finale (if we’re feeling adventurous).

3:57 pm: Just jumped to Atlanta-Pittsburgh. Matt Ryan, he of “yeah, he’ll have a bounce back year!” fame, just threw an INT in the fourth quarter, game tied at 9. But! Atlanta coach Mike Smith challenges the call. Drink!

3:59 pm: Did I just hear Sandstorm at Heinz Field?!!? In the words of Danielle from Bad Girls Club, “HOW DARE THEY???!!!?” (I actually like it)

4:01 pm: Making a cameo at the ManZone, @ZenLizzie! I’m also playing her in ¡La Liga! this week. Lots of death stares going on right now.

4:02 pm: The announcing team for Atlanta and Pittsburgh just spent about 30 minutes waxing poetic about the pick by Polamalu.

4:06 pm: Jeff Reed with a 34 yard field goal try to give Pittsburgh the lead. Of course he missed!!

4:08 pm: In Chicago!! Calvin Johnson makes a sensational catch. But, uh, he has to hold on to the ball throughout the catch. Mike Somebody in L.A. is giving some crap about “the entire process.” Le sigh.

4:10 pm: It’s final in Houston: The Texans beat the Colts, 34-24. So, obviously, the Texans are going to the Super Bowl!!!

4:15 pm: Rashard Mendenhall with the walkoff touchdown run! Steelers win! And now we have to look at those hideous shirts these guys are wearing on the sideline.

4:16 pm: Actual commentary from the TV guys: “They just kept pounding it, and pounding it, and pounding it…” Drink!

4:22 pm: David Garrard’s “nimble feet and elusive moves” got him…2 yards. NFL: Feel the Hyperbole!

4:24 pm: On to Istanbul! Team USA beating Turkey by 17. Of course, had we lost, we could have just nuked the bastards. And finally, you can say “the world champions of basketball!” and mean it!

4:27 pm: And we’re off to Philly! Where Aaron Rodgers promptly pulls a Brett Favre to evade the rush and complete a pass to James Jones. Lusting for those Eagles unis, by the way.

Just wear these all year, guys. OK, thanks!

4:32 pm: Arian Foster had about 491 yards today. The sound you hear is everyone in America breaking their neck to get him on their fantasy football team.

4:34 pm: The Lady just gave me a random high five. Why? Because she just unlocked the ultimate mode(??) on Monsters vs. Aliens. Hey now, we all have a passion!

4:35 pm: Matt Moore left the Panthers-Giants game with an injury. The ailment? Too much hanging out with Jake Delhomme, obviously.

4:37 pm: A Michael Vick sighting! Drink! And the patented boo birds from the fans at the Linc. Football season is back in full effect!

4:41 pm: On to Seattle! I think this is a good example of a good uniform choice (San Francisco) and a poor one (Seattle).

4:43 pm: Frank “Don’t Call Him Al” Gore with a couple of first downs. Should I brag now that I got him in the 3rd round of the ¡La Liga! draft?

4:45 pm: False start penalty on San Fran. Drink!

4:48 pm: I’m wondering who will have the truck commercial with nudity. Because let’s face it: No one cares about the towing capacity.

4:51 pm: Quick college note: The Associated Press has the Gamecocks ranked at 13. Because, you know, that’s justified and all. (Who am I kidding? I’ll take it!)

4:58 pm: The smack talk is on level 12 here at the ManZone. Currently it’s Fancy Pants 93, Stars and Bars 90.

5:03 pm: We’ve been watching the Eagles-Packers game for about 10 minutes. I think Aaron Rodgers was sacked about 84 times in that span. Super Bowl contenders, eh?

5:05 pm: Yes FOX, I definitely wanted to see a slow mo replay of Leonard Weaver getting his leg violated!!!

5:08 pm: That sound you hear is Philadelphia calling to see if Donovan McNabb is available. Wait, too soon?

5:12 pm: New wrinkle to the drinking game: Any time you hear the phrase “the decision” OR just “decision” in general. You know, just to make LeBron a part of your football viewing.

5:18 pm: There’s a free trial of NFL Sunday Ticket. On the Game Mix channel, they just play music for the games that are already over. Melanie Fiona is a great anthem for the NFL!!

Hey Panthers fans, just listen to Melanie Fiona. That'll make the Trent Edwards crap job from today a little better, no?

5:21 pm: On to St. Louis! Darnell Dockett botched a chance to pick up a loose ball. Hmmm, maybe he should stop tweeting so much.

5:25 pm: Random, yet relevant tweet: lamest smack talking board ever http://twitpic.com/2nvfoy @itsjordylive Courtesy of @ZenLizzie

5:29 pm: Alternate weird sequences: Stewart Bradley staggered around like he got knocked out, while Ryan Grant played hot foot on the sideline to the locker room.

5:35 pm: The Eagles have a grand total of zero passing yards thus far. Honestly, I think Eagles fans would go for A.J. Feely at this point.

5:37 pm: Although Jordy Nelson dropped that ball, it was well behind him.

5:45 pm: Joe Buck just said, “Kevin Kolb FUCKING SUCKS today” in a very nice, politically correct way. That’s why they pay him the big bucks!

5:48 pm: Took the lead in my ¡La Liga! matchup, 99-93. I’ll pretend not to care about the fact that she has Phillip Rivers playing tomorrow night. Somebody give him the ebola virus!

5:55 pm: In Seattle, Pete Carroll thought that his team connected with the crowd. What the hell does he think this is, a Lady Gaga Concert?

5:57 pm: Finally, a TAINT by Alex Smith, taken to the end zone by Marcus Trufant!! (Touchdown after Interception) Drink! Isn’t Trufant older than Favre?

5:59 pm: We’ll end this segment with a random, yet relevant tweet: OK, can we now agree it’s Andy Reid and not Donovan? (Courtesy of @Locs_n_Laughs)

Goodness gracious. This blog EN VIVO is going to have to take a water break. Hope you enjoyed this space thus far…

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