The BABY BLOG. (So what are y’all having?)

Oh wait, were you aware that I was going to be a dad?!!? Well, I’m going to be a dad. In like 80 days or so. So, since this is definitely happening, I figured I’d sum up, um, what’s been going on as well as some general observations. Because, let’s be honest: That’s what you do when you have kids. You talk about them a lot.

This post has been long overdue. I’m actually somewhat sorry about that. My baby related tweeting ratio is somewhere in the range of one every 4 tweets, which I think means something. I can no longer watch anything where a baby or child is in harm/danger and not get overly emotional. I spend time in the baby section without being prompted at department stores. I lust after cool looking strollers and car seats, and I get choked up at that baseball commercial with all the kids in it (which is conveniently not available anywhere online. Suck it, MLB). If I’m not in full-fledged Parent Mode yet, I think I’m getting close. (Of course, there’s really no measuring stick for Parent Mode, so whatever)

Without a doubt, the question we’ve been asked the most is “Do you know what y’all are having?” It happens to be my most and least favorite question. From Day One, I’ve been pretty adamant in saying that I don’t want to know the sex of my child until h/she is born. It seems that Meggen and I are the only people who want to hold out for one last surprise. (Well, there was a lady we met at a wedding who I think started crying when she mentioned how fun it was for them to not know, but that’s for another day) I’ve heard everything from “Well how are you going to know how to do the nursery?” to “Well how am I going to know what to get for the baby?!!” to “WHAT ABOUT NAMES?” when I answer the “what are you having question” with “We’re waiting until the baby’s born.”

*In case you were looking for my responses to those responses, we are doing a jungle theme, (insert inappropriate but probably funny Jungle Fever line) we have a registry, (for those unsure about gifts) and we have names for a boy (Peyton Emanuel) and girl (Lyla Mae). I think I just interrupted myself.*

Anyway, just because we’re creating some gender drama doesn’t mean we can’t have fun with it. So, we may or may not have been on Internet this evening looking at rather idiotic a few old wives’ tales. (Is the “old” referring the fact that the women themselves were old, or that said tales have been around awhile?) We’ve also recounted events leading up to…um, today, because apparently that can tell you something also. Anyway, here’s what we have so far.

Favorite Wives’ Tale: The Ring Trick
All of the links I found for this annoyed me, but here’s how it works: You attach a wedding ring to

Just so you know, we used a real ring. It’s of a snake. You needed to know that.

a string and hang it over the mother’s belly. If the ring swings back and forth, it’s a boy. If the ring circles around, it’s a girl. For us, the ring swung back and forth. BOY

Baby heart rate
If the baby’s heart rate is above 140, it’s a girl. Below 140? Hermaphrodite Boy. Peapie (working name for the fetus until it’s born, just so we’re clear) has consistently been over 140. GIRL

My Weight Gain (Yes, really)
Well, I’m still on Weight Watchers, which is still working well for me. So, since I haven’t gained weight since we found out, that “means it’s a BOY.”

Shape of Meggen’s belly
Of course, it’s quite cute. Right now, the baby bump has a watermelon-like shape. GIRL

The Mayan Tale
Well, of course, the Mayans think that all of us (including our unborn child) are done for by the end of this year. Anyway, you add the mother’s age at conception (27) to the year of conception (11). If the number is odd, it’s a boy. As you can see with the numbers given, this leads to a GIRL

Of course, there are probably tons of tales out there. Of course, my mom had a girl first, all of my close friends had girls first, and Beyoncé said that girls run the world. So, maybe these tales are true. What do you think we’re having? I’ll attach some pictures that will likely do nothing to help you decide.

3D ultrasounds are undoubtedly creepy. But hey, IT’S A BABY’S FACE!

I think the baby is sucking his/her thumb here. I really have no effin idea.